After a while, Stephanie replied, “Uhm yes, you can give it to him.”
“Really? Are you sure you are okay with it? You are not obliged to yield because I brought it up”, Debbie answered.
“No, it’s okay. I can’t keep running from him. I think it’s high time we spoke”.
Stephanie was jolted from her sleep by the beeping sound of her alarm. It was a Saturday morning. She drowsily reached out to her phone on the bedside table and switched it off. She turned to continue her sleep, but she suddenly remembered she had a date with Richard that day. She jumped off her bed to prepare for the day, but before anything, she needed to have her morning devotion.
She whistled in excitement as she selected her clothes, rummaging through her wardrobe. “The straight-cut black dress might look too serious.”, she thought to herself. “The sequins? No na, this is not a party. I want something simple yet elegant.” At last, she picked the black flowery-designed flayed gown and a pair of nude heeled sandals.
Meeting with Richard was like something out of a dream. The tour around Port Jackson Bay had been on her to-do list since she arrived in Australia. The feel of the warm sea breeze and the scent of the salty sea made for a memorable experience. The boring people that defined water as colourless, odourless and tasteless are yet to see the beautiful blueness of the one before her and the fresh scent it exuded.
For dinner, Richard selected the fanciest diner in Sydney. He was attentive to note that she was allergic to peanuts and had confirmed the menu before they arrived. The dinner was delicious, and they talked and laughed all through.
However, Stephanie felt restless. She tried as much as she could to ignore the feeling all evening, but with each passing tick, her foreboding grew.
When she couldn’t resist any longer, she told Richard she was tired and wanted to go home.
A streak of emotion she couldn’t describe ran through his face for a fleeting second and disappeared.
“Is everything okay?” He asked.
He beckoned the waiter for the check and paid for their meal. She watched him intently; the grace and fluidity of his movements struck a deep chord within her. He was handsome. And although she liked him and his gracefulness, she was aware that was the first and last of their date.
“Yes, I’m fine. My head aches a little bit”, pressing her temples. Even though that was true, she knew that wasn’t the reason she was leaving.
“Alright. I’ll send you home.”
The ride home was a silent one. She was brooding on the possible reasons why God was saying “NO” and couldn’t come up with any. Richard had his hands on the steering wheel and his taut face looking ahead almost all through the ride. She concluded he was offended at her. Who wouldn’t be? And how are we going to continue in this friendship?
Pulling up in front of her apartment complex, he turned towards her and said the most unexpected thing.
“Don’t be wary, Steph, God makes all things beautiful in its time. I also didn’t feel released by God to continue in this step. I just didn’t know how to bring it up.”
Stephanie’s eyes widened in shock. She gave a nervous laugh.
“How? Why? Wh…? I mean, when did you… have you known all along?” She tried to bring out words. She usually gets tongue-tied when caught off guard.
“When you went further down to take a few pictures, I was asked what I was doing there”, he said, smiling.
Stephanie chatted with him for a while, and they discussed some of the things God had said to them. She was amazed at how precisely Richard heard and understood God. They bade each other good nights, and Stephanie went in.
Although the course of the day hadn’t gone as she had planned, she was glad she met a Christian brother sincere in his walk with God, solidifying what God had been saying “don’t judge all men by your experience”. And she was happier that her friendship with him wouldn’t be broken.
Her phone rang again.
Walking out of the lift on the 7th floor, her phone rang. Reaching into her purse, she brought out her phone and checked the caller. It was an unknown number with an Australian number code. Thinking it was one of those spam calls, she ignored it, unlocked her door and went inside.
Which spam caller calls by this time of the night. Maybe it was Richard calling with a second number. She picked up the call.
“Hello”
“Hi. It’s David”
Cold shivers ran through Stephanie’s body. She was stopped in her tracks. A rush of emotions followed. Anger. Regret. Sadness. Joy. Angst. Love. Love welled up in her heart for him. A surge of love she knew that couldn’t have come from her previous relations with him because… That felt new. She realized she had missed him.
“Steph, are you there?”
She swallowed hard, “Yes”.
She hung her jacket on the hanger pinned to the wall, pulled off her shoes, slipped on her pink fluffy slippers, and moved to sit on the sofa.
David paused. He had many things to say to her but didn’t know where to start. He wanted to apologize, to make her know he knew how much he had erred and had realized his foolishness.
The question she had asked him that day, “Dave, who have you been listening to?” stung him. And after he left, it was like an anthem that kept ringing in his head. He realized he had lost his fellowship with God. He was all about religion but void of life. He longed to let her know how much he had grown and is still growing with God, how God had used their breakup to jolt him awake and make him aware of his pride.
He felt insecure about her progress when things weren’t going well with him at the office. Soon after, he yielded to people who made him believe being the head equals being the Lord. He wanted to thank her for not yielding even when it was painful.
He knew he might not have a chance with her again, but he desired her forgiveness. Debbie had told him all she had gone through and even told him about the Richard guy. He also wanted to see her face and know how she had been all this while, but the words were stuck in his throat.
“Dave, I’m sorry. I…” she swallowed again. “I was self-righteous.” tears slipped from her eyes.
David was broken. He was convinced this could only be God. How could she apologize after all the pain he had caused her. He became teary-eyed. He had not been one to emotionally react to things. Maybe this also came with God’s dealings. He couldn’t tell.
He cut her short, “No, I should be the one apologizing Steph, not you. God helped me through you. I was blind to the Jesus’ kind of love, blind to the kind of husband God wanted me to be. I didn’t know I could only love my wife as much as I receive and understand the love of Christ. Instead of washing and grooming you, I was envious of your seeming success. I became selfish, Steph. It was me… I was fool….”
He stopped short and sniffed.
Stephanie heard him clear his throat from the other end. It was clear something had happened to him. The David she knew was an eloquent man who never struggled with words and would do anything to avoid saying sorry.
“Dave, but I wasn’t ready to submit in everything; wasn’t ready to submit my visions, plans, the ‘seeming’ wisdom and even myself to you. As a matter of fact, I internally fought with that word ‘submission’ ”.
She halted and took a long breath.
“Dave, I realized even though I have all these dreams, God had chosen me to be a helpmeet for you to accomlpish His purpose for your life. I’ve come to understand that, with all I have, I was made for you. The Holy Spirit has made me understand that, just as the Church is subject to Christ, a woman is to submit her vision, dreams, potential, wisdom, ideas, plans, finances, and even her body to the man, as a help for him to become all that he is called to be. But I wasn’t willing to follow anybody. You remember how I battled with following our Pastor back then in school. I had always thought hearing God was enough for me and was about to carry that attitude into marriage”.
He interrupted her. “Me too, Steph. I wasn’t prepared to be a husband. I’ve come to understand now that I am to love you as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her, which entails lavishing all my grace, capabilities, affection, attention, time, money, convenience, and even my life if need be to nurture you (by all the time taking your needs into consideration first before mine), and building you into all that God has ordained for you to be. I wasn’t prepared for that level of sacrificial love”.
“But, I left..”, she interjected.
“No Steph, what God wanted us to do is over here in Sydney, He simply sent you over first. I should have gone back to hear from Him, concerning you but I was blinded by my ego”.
The cry party continued for at least 30 minutes. They kept going back and forth about where they had missed it. It was clear that even though they were miles apart, they had both been schooled by the same Teacher. David told her he had arrived in Sydney 2 months ago but had intentionally waited for her to give him a listening ear. He knew all that was going on in her life and could have gotten her itinerary from Debbie.
They agreed to meet up the next day in church. Stephanie found out his address was closer to her church than hers. But funny enough, David had been introduced to another church, and thus God had kept them separated.
After the call, Stephanie knelt before God to confirm if this came from Him. She didn’t want to walk into the same mess twice. It was clear that she loved David, but as she had learnt, only God can sustain a Godly marriage. And her answer came from 1 Sam 30:8
And David inquired at the LORD, saying, Shall I pursue after this troop? Shall I overtake them? And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail recover all.
She arrived at church early. She wanted to watch him walk in like the first day they had met, but this time, the tables were turned. David had beat her to it; he wanted to watch his queen walk in. He would later joke that he couldn’t let her enjoy that experience twice. He has to tell their kids that he didn’t make the same mistake twice.
After service, they went to a restaurant closest to the church. She had always found it easy talking to David. They gisted like they were never separated. Stephanie found out David had been promoted and sent by his company as a creative manager for their new branch in Sydney. She found out also that David now had disciplers he submitted to.
Amidst the chats, David asked her, “I knew I made a mistake, Steph, but can I get a second chance with you?”
Stephanie blushed, batting her lashes. She couldn’t believe the person sitting in front of her was David. She was sure David was aware that she was single, but instead of coming to dictate that “God had said…”, he was asking her out. He was totally a changed man.
She smiled and said, “I’ll go back and ask God”.
David simply nodded, “Okay, I’d wait till you give me an answer”.
She peered at him through her lashes and saw him twitching his fingers. He was nervous. She laughed inside. She was his, and she knew it, but in order not to appear cheap, she had given him that response.
As if that wasn’t convincing enough, she added, “I still need to talk to mummy Ate”. She said that as though trying to convince herself.
“I know”, he replied.
“You’d have to wait at least a week, Dave”, she whispered to herself and smiled,
Three months had gone into their courtship, and they had been attending marriage counselling sessions together. Pastor Liam and Ella, his wife, their Aussie Pastors, had told her that she had to be sure she was ready to spend the rest of her life submitting to his leadership in every area of her life.
As they returned from one of the counselling sessions, Stephanie sat in the passenger’s seat, admiring the man driving beside her. She went down memory lane and couldn’t thank God more for the man beside her and their experiences together, including the breakup. She hadn’t been sure she was willing to submit to his “headship” then, but she was now. Her trust wasn’t in what she could see but because she was convinced God was his head and leader.
David noticed her gaze.
“Have I grown wings? Or you can’t get more of this handsomeness?” he teased, gesticulating.
She laughed. “Abeegi. But you shaa fine, small”, demonstrating with her hands.
Pulling into the parking lot, he said, “Goodbye Steph. I love you.”
Winking at him, “I love you more. See you tonight”.
They had weekly Thursday night prayers for their marriage as advised by mummy Ate.
David watched her walk in before driving off, “Daddy, thank You for Your redemption and for preserving us”.
Kumbukani
This whole story was nice😂😂 I enjoyed a bit of every moment and I must submit that I have learnt a lot from it. Thank you for this awesome piece, it was worth it.
Ufedo Ojile
I am glad That David was humble enough to accept the chastisement of the Holy spirit. A good piece.