“So David, what do you mean?” Stephanie asked, wide-eyed.
*****
She had met David in her third year at the university, and the details of the day she first set her eyes on him remain vivid in her memory. She was leading praise and worship in church when he elegantly walked in
His perfectly ironed white shirt, which hugged his body and outlined his sculpted upper body figure, was neatly tucked into ankle-length grey trousers. A blue striped tie graciously hung from the shirt’s collar and was held in place by the silver clip. She couldn’t forget the neatly trimmed hair, with the sharply carved hairline. She had a fetish for guys with low-cut hair, and if they happened to be dressed in formal outfits, that was a combo she couldn’t resist.
Stephanie isn’t one to let her emotions show. In her usual demeanour, she had kept her cool and didn’t take a peek in his direction throughout the service. When the service was over, David walked up to her. Apparently, he had taken a liking for her as well and wanted to get to know her. And that was one of the many things she found attractive about him — his confidence.
At the time, David had just resumed his Master’s programme at the university. They had exchanged contacts and thus began their story. David went through all the protocols and requirements for members who wanted to court within the fellowship. She had insisted she couldn’t be in a relationship with him except it was with marriage in view, and he agreed to her condition.
David was a fellowship leader during his undergraduate days, so he had no trouble blending with this new group. Soon, he was made the Bible study coordinator. David and Stephanie became the envied lovebirds in their fellowship, and everyone admired them. In fact, they were often referred to as a true example of Christian relationships, and everyone wanted a relationship like theirs.
They both finished their programmes and graduated together. On the night of their graduation, David sneaked her away from their friends after all the celebration. He took her to a park, where he had prepared a secret night picnic. She was surprised as well as overjoyed.
They discussed their future and how beautiful it would be. As a UI/UX Designer, David already had some job offers on the table awaiting his response. They discussed their life purposes — David wanted to continue mentoring the boys God had given him. On the other hand, Steph felt God was leading her to go for her Master’s programme outside the country. David had reservations about her plans but didn’t comment on them. Their future was bright, and God was with them.
After he led her back to the hostel, he hugged her and whispered, “I love you baby. I couldn’t thank God more for bringing you into my life when He did. I can’t wait to do life with you”.
Stephanie had to wait an entire year to resume her Master’s programme abroad. While she waited, they were introduced to each other’s parents, and planned to start preparations for their marriage when she returned from her studies.
A few months after she left the country, Stephanie noticed that the frequency with which she spoke with David reduced, and she felt him withdrawing from her. She stayed up some nights to talk with him over the phone, and after a few minutes on the call, he’d say he had something to do. They had some arguments about the issue but made no headway. So she decided to come home during the summer break after her 2nd semester so she could sort things out with David.
*****
“I mean this relationship is not working anymore, can’t you see it?” David replied, leaning on the ebony basket-weaved table.
Steph was confused.
“How Dave? I don’t understand. Please, explain to me.” Her voice was cracking, and tears welled up in her eyes. She blinked hard to force back the tears. She really didn’t want to be emotional.
David looked down for a moment and then back at her.
“I don’t understand what you don’t understand. This relationship is over”, David said, looking into her eyes.
“Why?”
“Must there be a reason?” he asked back.
Stephanie was losing her cool. She covered her face with her palms and wiped her tears, stifling a sniff.
“David, I need to understand why after everything, after all we shared, the plans, the dreams…” her voice broke. She pulled out a wipe from her black handbag to wipe her tears.
David looked away.
“Is everything okay with you? Are you sick? Or is this some sort of prank?” she asked, her voice weaker.
David looked at her and said firmly, “We can’t work, Stephanie. I want to take care of my wife or my future wife.”
“What exactly does that mean? Aren’t you taking care of me?” Stephanie was perplexed. She could see from his eyes that he was being serious.
“Every time we talk, Stephanie, you have one dream or the other. You barely have time for me, how can you be a wife like that… talk more of taking care of children?”
Stephanie gave him a baffled look and wiped her tears, “David, can you stop beating around the bush? Go straight to the point. I want to understand what you are insinuating”, she said in a firm voice.
David swallowed, then looked straight at her with furrowed brows, “This is exactly what I’m talking about. You are too proud. You are not submissive as a wife should be. Or aren’t you a Christian? Isn’t it written in your Bible? Or don’t you read it? I voiced my opinion about you traveling but you ignored me and still went ahead. I told you to come back after the 1st semester, did you?”
Stephanie was quiet. Her heart was being shredded, but she needed him to keep talking. He always liked to have the last words. To quell her anger, she clenched her fists beneath the table.
“Oh, why are you quiet now? Have you seen where you erred? Is your conscience pricking you? I’ve been trying to correct that part of you since we met but you haven’t been listening. You are meant to help me. That’s why God created you. I am meant to tell you what to do. If not, why are we in each other’s life?”
Stephanie kept quiet for a while and then asked, “Have you always thought this of me?”
“You see what I’m saying. You weren’t even listening to this simple conversation we were having”, David sneered.
Stephanie shook her head and said, “David, you weren’t like this a year ago. Who have you been listening to?”
David snapped.
“So it’s my fault? I’m here trying to help you so you don’t break another guy’s heart when you meet him. Men like obedience. Period. But if you continue like this, one thing is sure: you’d never get married.”
Stephanie shook her head again and looked him straight in the face.
“If you are looking for a docile visionless woman, I’m sorry to disappoint you, because I’m not her. I have a mission given by God on this earth and I must fulfill it. Our purposes don’t tally. You are looking for an empty bus, but I am a loaded one looking for a good driver”.
She paused.
“It’s a pity that three years were wasted on this. But I’m not sorry to pursue what God gave to me because before I met you, I had met Him, and He likes the me you see. And I’ll have to answer to Him when we leave this world”, she continued.
David was livid.
“So I am the one that doesn’t know God. I know Him too. I read my Bible, and I do understand what it meant when the Bible said, “Women, submit to your husbands in all things”. I was actually here thinking that if you listened to me and reconsidered travelling back, we might continue the relationship”, raising his voice.
Stephanie smirked. She wasn’t going to let him get under her skin again. She disliked this side of him — his overconfidence, but she had thought he’d change due to his love for her. He liked things to always be his way and according to his pattern. Every other person was wrong, and he was right.
“Why are you smiling? You are not meant to be doing so”, David added.
“Oh, so I can’t also smile? Or laugh? Or cry? Except you permit that? Is that the kind of woman you want?” Stephanie replied.
David stood up furiously.
“Stephanie, good bye. It was nice meeting you”, he said and started walking away.
“David, walking through that door, and out of my life would be a grave mistake”, Stephanie called out to him.
David, without turning back, nodded, “Yes ma’am”.
Stephanie sat there recollecting herself. She had tried to appear emotionless for most of the conversation, but her heart had been ripped open. She bent her head on the table and wept.
Was this what God meant in the morning when He said, “Oh generation of vipers, how can you being evil, speak good things?” Had David been evil all along while speaking good things?
“God!”, She cried. “This was not what we agreed on. This is heart-rending”.
“A NEW DAY HAS DAWNED, STEPH” she heard in her heart. She knew what it meant, but she’d need Him to mend her broken heart.
Can a self (God) sufficient girl following purpose get a husband in this world?
Honour
Oh great, can’t wait for the continuation.
Such a beautiful story with lots of messages.
Peter Atim
The challenges of our time, in the beginning God created man and gave him the whole responsibility and ask the woman to help him actualize it but sooner or later the woman decided to take the leadership role. And that lead us to the first discontentment from Eve which changed the entire cause of creation. It ruins the original plan of God for creation.
She accused God of depriving her of one true thing that will bring fulfillment in her life.
The Genesis of feminism and woman libration , God created man and woman with a glorious harmony of difference. Man is an initiator and a woman receiver. One as a leader and the other as a follower.
Even the physiology of a woman is meant to receive and man to initiate.
Even love, man is the one to start pursuing a lady not the other way.
God gave man the strength to do hard labour which was not given to woman. You will hear a married woman complaining, please don’t start it, I had a stressful day at work and I am not in the mood.
God gave woman the the ability to mother generations. If a mother is absent in the life of a child that child’s destiny is at stack.
Woman has the capability to manage, and God gave women to manage the must important aspect of creation the home. The trouble we have today in the society is the absent of mother’s at home and children are left in the hands of all manner of people and institutions in the name of working class lady.
A child at the age of three or four will be left in the hands of strangers because the mother is working.
Before you know he has his first learning outside the home and this is what has brought the world where it is today.
All the leadership role played by a woman without submitting it to the husband brought trouble in the Bible.
The moment Eve took that position of leadership the creation was ruined.
Jezebel was the leader instead of king Ahab and we all know the story.
Sarah told Abraham to sleep with her maidservant and the sad history that came from that act. She later fought the whole idea and Ishmael and his lineage has cause a great pain to the whole world.
Deborah judge the Israelites under the subjection of the husband.
Woman are a beautiful creation to help man succeed and watch over his esteemed garden The home. That’s is the order.
The world created by God has order or rank, as powerful as angels are they are our servants, to give us divine guidance.
The role of a woman is not inferior at all, a man can never fit into it, no matter how strong the man is.
It’s just about role and the difference between man and woman. I have great respect for women, my mother took care of me when I lost my dad at the age of 18 months old. If she was absent I am not sure I could have been where I am today. She taught me so much, how to be hardworking and responsible from childhood. I Started helping to take care of home at the age of 11 years or there about. So I know a bit of what I am saying.
Our fulfillment lies in living and doing what God created us for, which is the DIVINE ASSIGNMENT.
Accepting our role and responsibilities under heaven.
Ufedo Ojile
David is so selfish and controlling. Stephanie should be glad she was exposed to this side outside marriage not in it. But I am curious, how you date someone for three years and recognise selfish or controlling traits? Or did she just ignore the red flags. Either ways David needs to go back to the secret place for the holy spirit to work on such a big ego.
He wants to be obeyed? lol he needs a doormat obviously and not a wife.
Moi
Magnifique; j’ai lu et j’ai vraiment apprécié et j’ai hâte de lire la suite.
Priscilla Ekpenyong
Personally, I feel there’s a point where they should have met. I don’t think they we’re talking to each other the way they should. I mean discussing and getting real responses. Especially David….. So many lessons here… Part 2 pls.
S.O
Obviously, I can say David is wrong in the story (especially from how it ended). But my question is: can a God-given purpose destroy a God-made relationship? I mean, Isn’t purpose meant to be the reason for a man and a woman to be together in the first place or idk.
I think there are a lot of foundational issues in Stephanie and David’s relationship. From inception, the attraction between them is very interesting.😅
Khero
To pick a side is a dilema , because Steph could be wanting to follow the Will of God yet She could be not submissive ( this happens a lot nowadays ), but my question is Who’s will was David following ?
Anyways shaaa
Part 2 shall make us know the rest
Nifemi
Truthfully it’s hard to pick a side now. I believe that if she truly heard God, she should be willing to submit to him. But also, David also has to be understanding and communicate his opinion well.
But the way he easily gives up on a 3 year relationship is very suspicious sha
Let’s see thé second part!
Eli_P
Hopefully David will have sense in the next episode and stop manipulating scriptures to suit his selfish and egoistic self.
Thank you very much Abba’s dwelling.
Biobele
A husband or husband to be is supposed to be a light bearer for his wife
Like Deborah’s husband Lapidot
Who was in no way intimidated by her success
If Lapidot was like David in this case Deborah would have no way been a judge.
I get David is frustrated by the distance and all and that’s understandable
But it doesn’t necessarily warrant a breakup
Stephanie on the other hand could have been a little bit more compliant
It seems like he really wanted to see her during the first break
And she refused to come
She only came because things had gone sour and I feel that part wasn’t reasonable
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